“A cocktail of deceit”

I engage in a number of rather strangely funny activities.

To thy own self – Be “TRUE” is a mindset that I love so much.

One of many reasons, I don’t hesitate joining public queues, moreso when it affords me that often rare opportunity to interact with all levels of people; young and old, rich and poor, beautiful and ugly.
I find banking hall queues especially interesting and exciting, I hear it’s the same experience with BRT queues too, I’m yet to undergo that anyway.

So this day, I had joined a long banking hall queue. The longer the more interesting they are. I calmly tuned my focus on my phone after taking a brief look around the banking hall.
As I contemplated what to do vis a vis looking around or browsing my phone, I got a ‘Hello’ from a young woman.

‘Please, are you the last person ? I’m behind you’

“I’m the first from behind” I said flashing her a smile.


“Everytime you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing”
– Mother Theresa


She returned the smile and left.

A much younger woman also came over:

‘Please, I’m behind you’

I quickly pointed out the first woman to her.

“You’re behind her, go tell her so”

The queue had moved a couple of steps by now, maybe about three. I swaggered on to close up the gap.

At this point, a youngman, probably twenty years in age; jagged head, hair uncombed and generally ruffled walked over the ropes used for demarcation and squeezed in between the guy ahead of me and myself.

“Hey, there’s a queue here” I nearly screamed.

‘I am behind him’ he pleaded, also nudging the other guy.

‘Yes he is’ the other guy ahead confirmed.

I made him understand that next time he ought to carry along the guy he was unceremoniously getting ahead of.

I buried my head into my phone once again.

A call came in for the youngman ahead of me and he picked.
In hush hush tone he conversed.

‘Mo wa ni hospital’
(I’m at the hospital)

He said other uninteresting things that I took no notice of and dropped the line. Some cock and bull stories.

“You just lied” I said to him.

“You’re not at the hospital” I reminded.

‘Yeah, but I left the hospital to come get money for my treatment’ he argued.

“That still doesn’t make you be at the hospital” I insisted.

“What if the person you just spoke to right now walks up the stairs ?” I challenged.

At this point he got the drift.


“It’s better to be slapped by the truth than kissed with a lie.”


“You just told a blatant lie. Also imagine a little child around, looking at you and hearing all that”.

He was sober by the time I was done with him. I’m sure he’ll think twice about lying in public again.

I was about the third person to the front on the queue by now.

Then the first woman approached, she had been sitting down all the while on a chair – Relaxed.

Protests. Outcries. Resistance.

She insisted she was behind me.
‘I took permission’ she added.

I told her, “Can you imagine the chaos if we had all gone to take a seat telling someone, I’m behind you ?”

The second woman also turned up at this stage, also wanting her ‘reserved’ space.

So much for ‘rights’ while undergoing public activities and engagements in Lagos.

Deceit. Lies. Bickering. Twists.

Enjoyable fun though !


“Live your life so that the preacher won’t have to lie at your funeral”




4 thoughts on ““A cocktail of deceit”

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